Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Exciting Jeff's LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, October 30th, 2007
10:39 pm	Hey Internet! What a bunch of dorks. (reciprocate)
Sunday, July 17th, 2005
4:57 pm	Back when I spoke to God, he basically quoted Kurt Vonnegut via Bokonon. This is what he said: "Live by the foma that make you brave and kind and healthy and happy." Everyone needs to hear that once in a while. Current Mood: calm Current Music: WFMU (4 beautiful lies | reciprocate)
Monday, June 27th, 2005
10:43 am	This weekend was amazing. Probably the best I've ever had. It was the sort of weekend that I'll remember in perfect detail 20 years down the line. The kind that I want to remember when I die. I can't say how, but it feels as though everything has changed. After the conversations I had, I'm much more confident about my place in the world, and I'm much more interested in getting out and doing things. Hell, I'm even reconsidering religion as a path to the reduction of jealousy. I realise that I'm being vague, but being any more specific wouldn't make much difference. For those of you who were there, you know. Know also that I love you, and I miss you, and I hope to see you soon. I hope this lasts. Current Mood: loved (2 beautiful lies | reciprocate)
Monday, June 6th, 2005
2:25 pm	Aw shit. Hello, Jeff, After reviewing your tape, I feel that it would be best if you interned with Leana this summer rather than give you your own show. I think you need a little more immersion in the type and style of music that (college radio station) plays. While I cannot pass you, I encourage you to learn from Leana and give it another shot in the Fall. Thanks, (Name) Program Director (Station) Motherfucker. After doing an AM show (with no listeners) for 6 months, interning with FM DJs for 3 or 4 months, hearing that they were "desperate" for summer DJs, finding the nerve to submit a demo tape, and waiting three weeks to hear back, I finally sent out an email this morning asking about my status. I didn't really expect anything good, since it had been excessively long, but this is exactly what I was afraid of hearing. It wasn't, as I'd hoped, some minor technical gaffe that kept me off the air, but rather my unfortunate lack of hipster-ness. Apparently, I am simply not cool enough. To be fair, it's my fault. I assumed for some reason that the station was freeform. Clearly, it is not. I understand that they might have a problem with the Springsteen song I threw in (I'm on Fire) because hipsters fucking hate Springsteen. Unfortunately, Ani DiFranco is also too mainstream. I recognize that she sells a lot of records, but she's not major label, and I've never heard her on the radio. Who knows which of the other songs on my playlist did not fit the station's completely misunderstood idea of "noncommercial radio". I am not interested in formatted radio, even if they do generally play good music. I'm also not interested in upping my hipster ante to impress people. So fuck this. I sent back a lengthy email explaining that I'd really like to do a late-night talk show, and they could supply me with a fucking list of songs to play during breaks. I hope something comes of it, but I've pretty much written it off. This is just the fucking self-esteem wrecking bullshit that I needed. Cigarettes, here I come. PS. Thanks for not telling me upfront that I'm not getting a show. Cowards. Current Mood: cynical (2 beautiful lies | reciprocate)
12:16 pm	Dear cigarettes, I'm beginning to wonder whether this separation is working out. I'm still coughing just as bad, and every week, we seem to have a drunken hook-up. Also, I'm beginning to wonder whether perhaps my respiratory problems are due more to the enormous amount of toxic, lung-destroying black mold I found growing all over the months-old pile of dishes in the sink. Maybe I've been blaming you erroneously. After all, you're always there when I need you, and our relationship is less rocky than most. The fact that I'm growing new life in the sink is far more embarassing that going back to you, anyway. We shall see. Love, Jeff Current Mood: bored Current Music: Office banter (reciprocate)
Wednesday, June 1st, 2005
9:12 am	Dear cigarettes- What happened last night was a lapse in judgment. I stand by everything I said, and I still think you're no good for me. I didn't even enjoy it. -Jeff Current Mood: guilty (1 beautiful lie | reciprocate)
Sunday, May 22nd, 2005
9:46 pm	An open letter to cigarettes Dear cigarettes, It's time for the inevitable. After years of faithful companionship, I have decided that things are not working out. Your presence has always been a welcome comfort, but that comfort no longer outweighs the suffering you cause. So I'm officially dumping you. I know this may seem sudden, but the truth is, I've been wanting to do this for a really long time. You were so controlling. There have always been things that I've really wanted to do, but couldn't, because of you. Maybe now that I'm free, I can finally travel. Up a flight of stairs, perhaps, or across the street. My world is one of pure possibility. That's not to say it will be easy. I know how hard it is to break up. I know I'll run into you everywhere I go, and when I see you, there will be a desperate longing to be with you. But I will remind myself how much better I am without you, and I will move on. And you're sociable enough; I'm sure you'll find somebody new. Still, I will miss you, and some part of me will always love you. Goodbye, my dear friends. -Jeff Current Mood: nostalgic Current Music: Robyn Hitchcock - Full moon in my Soul (6 beautiful lies | reciprocate)
Wednesday, May 11th, 2005
6:46 pm	Inexpliable sensation of bliss bubbling through my grey matter, despite everything. Nothing has changed but my internal chemistry. Unable to shake the notion that this is some sort of lucid dream, despite the fact that I can't do anything out of the ordinary. Is this satori or a flashback? Does it matter? Current Mood: mellow Current Music: Ted Leo and the Pharmacists- Parallel or Together (1 beautiful lie | reciprocate)
Tuesday, April 19th, 2005
1:29 am	Meet the new boss, same as the old boss. Papal elections are a bit like Republican primaries; I'm not particularly concerned, because I know I'm bound to be disappointed with the winner. But even within the back-assward world of the Catholic Church, progressive voices really need to be heard. So they elected Ratzinger. I haven't been this angry with the Catholic church since the first time I realized that they were lying to me. On the bright side, John Paul I lived for what, a month? We can hope that Ratzinger makes his glorious return to the Kingdom with the same sort of celerity. I really need to go piss on an altar or something. No religion for America! No religion for the world! Current Mood: disappointed (1 beautiful lie | reciprocate)
Monday, April 18th, 2005
9:06 pm	More Adventures in Cybersex I love the fact that I sent this guy a numbered picture, clearly out of my "Porno" folder, and he was OK with that. BriMan1020: asl FreakyGirl23: 23/f/ma BriMan1020: pic? FreakyGirl23: Yeah, hold on BriMan1020 wants to directly connect. BriMan1020 is now directly connected. FreakyGirl23 wants to send file C:\Porno\2725.jpg. BriMan1020 received C:\Porno\2725.jpg. BriMan1020 direct connection is closed. BriMan1020: nice tits FreakyGirl23: Yeah, so tell me a little about yourself? BriMan1020: what u wanna know FreakyGirl23: Well, a pic would be nice BriMan1020: dont have 1 on this com sry FreakyGirl23: Then describe yourself. BriMan1020: 5'2 black hair brown eyes tan and muscular FreakyGirl23: Interests? BriMan1020: baseball video games tennis and chicks FreakyGirl23: Video games, eh? BriMan1020: yeah FreakyGirl23: Like what? BriMan 1020: sports games FreakyGirl23: Baseball, sports games, tennis, and chicks... all my favorite things BriMan1020: :-D FreakyGirl23: So, how freaky do you like to get? BriMan1020: depends on the chick FreakyGirl23: I like to dress up like an upside down Coca Cola bottle and have men eat me out with a straw FreakyGirl23: You into that? BriMan1020: yeah FreakyGirl23: Well, how about it? BriMan1020: id do it FreakyGirl23: Alright. I also like to make out with other girls and make men listen through the walls. BriMan1020: :-) FreakyGirl23: or other men BriMan1020: nice FreakyGirl23: do you have any toys? BriMan1020: np BriMan1020 signed off at 8:57:26 PM. BriMan1020 signed on at 8:59:56 PM. I'm really not feeling very creative today... ti G er eyezz420: hi asl FreakyGirl23: 23/f/ma FreakyGirl23: u? ti G er eyezz420: 20.m.ca ti G er eyezz420: pic? FreakyGirl23: Yeah ti G er eyezz420 wants to directly connect. FreakyGirl23 declines request; no connection was made. (Note: For best results, you and your buddy should use the latest version of AIM.). FreakyGirl23 wants to directly connect. ti G er eyezz420 is now directly connected. FreakyGirl23: ti G er eyezz420: nice FreakyGirl23: You have one? ti G er eyezz420: so how freaky are u? ti G er eyezz420: no sorry i dont FreakyGirl23: Real freaky. FreakyGirl23: What do you like? ti G er eyezz420: i love gettin head FreakyGirl23: That's not really freaky. ti G er eyezz420: i know ti G er eyezz420: but its what i like.. FreakyGirl23: Don't you like anything a little freakier? ti G er eyezz420: like what? ti G er eyezz420: explain.. FreakyGirl23: Have you ever seen Resevoir Dogs? ti G er eyezz420: no ti G er eyezz420: y? FreakyGirl23: Hmm, nevermind then. FreakyGirl23: Do you get off on hitting women? ti G er eyezz420: like physical abuse? FreakyGirl23: Would you hit me if I asked you to? ti G er eyezz420 direct connection is closed. ti G er eyezz420 signed off at 8:39:46 PM. I just think this guy's SN should be available. SkywayRaptor: horny tonite? FreakyGirl23: Always SkywayRaptor: nice asl FreakyGirl23: 16/f/ma SkywayRaptor: 32m ny here FreakyGirl23: So what are you into? SkywayRaptor: cummin hard u FreakyGirl23: Well, that certainly doesn't sound bad. SkywayRaptor: no it doesnt FreakyGirl23: How do you propose I do that? SkywayRaptor: im sure you know hwo to accomplish it FreakyGirl23: Does it involve my mouth? SkywayRaptor: oh it could FreakyGirl23: Does it involve my perky little tits? SkywayRaptor: most definitly could at that SkywayRaptor: so what do you look like FreakyGirl23: Does it involve my tight little pussy? SkywayRaptor: im sure it could FreakyGirl23: Does it involve statutory rape, you freakish little child molester? SkywayRaptor: i didnt say it involved me and you FreakyGirl23: Clearly. FreakyGirl23: Go kill yourself. SkywayRaptor: i just answered your q and a FreakyGirl23: You must be proud. SkywayRaptor: whatever ive moved on so should you SkywayRaptor signed off at 9:00:16 PM. This one backfired when I realized that I would be the one breaking the law... dammit. tannyboy7890: hey asl? FreakyGirl23: 15/f/ma. u? tannyboy7890: nice tannyboy7890: 17 m tannyboy7890: with vid tannyboy7890: you ahve pics? tannyboy7890: o ranythign FreakyGirl23: not really, no FreakyGirl23: i don't have a camera. tannyboy7890: darn tannyboy7890 signed off at 9:10:23 PM. And this... this is a fucking disaster. brokenangel0917: hello FreakyGirl23: hey brokenangel0917: asl FreakyGirl23: 23/f/ma FreakyGirl23: u? brokenangel0917: 22/f/indiana FreakyGirl23: What's up? brokenangel0917: nothing brokenangel0917: u? FreakyGirl23: Not too much brokenangel0917: lol brokenangel0917: same here brokenangel0917: you got any pics?? FreakyGirl23: No, sorry. FreakyGirl23: You? brokenangel0917: nope brokenangel0917: sorry FreakyGirl23: so you lookin' for poontang? brokenangel0917: pussy......yeah brokenangel0917: lol FreakyGirl23: Sorry, my father was in Viet Nam, so I talk that way sometimes. He saw some crazy shit, though. He had both of his arms blown off, and he ran through an entire Viet Cong camp to reach the medic with the fireteam on the other side. brokenangel0917: ok FreakyGirl23: Took out three gooks on his way, too. He was using an experimental flamethrower that operated based on hip movements. It worked well in that particular situation, but it was never mass produced because of obvious safety problems. brokenangel0917: alrighty then FreakyGirl23: But he's alright. brokenangel0917: cool FreakyGirl23: My stepbrother, on the other hand, is a mess. All into heroin and stuff. He went to school in Rhode Island, and nobody ever heard from him again. brokenangel0917: are you crazy or something.....or are you just trying to scare people off FreakyGirl23: Huh? brokenangel0917: nothing brokenangel0917: dont worry about it FreakyGirl23: No, I just feel that we should know a little something about one another. brokenangel0917: oh ok FreakyGirl23: So tell me a little something about yourself brokenangel0917: what do you want to know FreakyGirl23: Whatever you feel like sharing. brokenangel0917: youll have to ask questions hun FreakyGirl23: Well, what's your first name? brokenangel0917: Emily brokenangel0917: u? FreakyGirl23: Amanda. brokenangel0917: nice to meet you amanda FreakyGirl23: And you. FreakyGirl23: Do you go to school? brokenangel0917: nope im graduated from high school brokenangel0917: hello??!! FreakyGirl23: hi. FreakyGirl23: sorry brokenangel0917: its ok brokenangel0917: are you busy?? FreakyGirl23: A little bit, yeah brokenangel0917: you want me to leave you alone?? FreakyGirl23: No, I'm fine brokenangel0917: ok FreakyGirl23: Have you ever seen The Godfather? brokenangel0917: nope FreakyGirl23: You should. It's an essential film FreakyGirl23: What was the last movie you saw? brokenangel0917: american pie 2 brokenangel0917: lol FreakyGirl23: And what did you think? brokenangel0917: it was fucking hilarious brokenangel0917: lol FreakyGirl23: Like Schindler's List hilarious, or more Keystone Kops hilarious? brokenangel0917: like keystone kops hilarious i guess brokenangel0917: cause i dont think schindlers list was funny FreakyGirl23: Oh, it definitely had its moments. That scene at the end with the rocks? It was Kaufman-esque. brokenangel0917: i just thought that was pointless brokenangel0917: the end part FreakyGirl23: Not even a titter? brokenangel0917: not even what FreakyGirl23: A titter. A chuckle. A mild guffaw? brokenangel0917: oh ok brokenangel0917 signed on at 9:11:42 PM. brokenangel0917 signed off at 9:11:47 PM. All in all, a pretty uninspired day. Current Mood: overwhelmed Current Music: Cowboy Junkies- Common Disaster (4 beautiful lies | reciprocate)
1:21 pm	HOT FUCKING DAMN!!!1111 I'm hung over like something else that's noted for being hung over. I've never been very good at similes. I had 15 people in my teenytiny apartment last night, and it was amazing. My mother ordered two cases of wine. Everyone worked together to finish one of them off, to differing degrees. Personally, I had about a quarter of it. I actually fell asleep during an interesting conversation last night. I wouldn't have even remembered if I didn't wake up with keys in my pocket. I swear, one day I'll learn. Everything in the last few days seems to be reminding me that I've never been to Europe. And that I need to quit smoking. And clean my monitor. And clean my house. And come up with something to present in honors. And write a 20 page paper on fucking video games. And write a number of short papers. And go to work. And go to the doctor. And write more. And get a decent night's sleep. And somehow not want to kill myself. So maybe now's not the best time to try quitting. How do I exist? Current Mood: groggy Current Music: Mirah- La Familia (So hot.) (5 beautiful lies | reciprocate)
Saturday, April 16th, 2005
12:06 pm	I'm never drinking again, Pt. 26 Motherfucker. I hate alcohol so fucking much. I hate it so much that I'm actually writing something. I'd been drinking, and Adam came over. We played 2 hands of poker, and I lost $150. I'm normally a pretty graceful loser, but Adam kept putting down twenties and fifties, because he has an assload of money, and I wasn't thinking clearly enough to realize that he could have had a straight. Motherfucker. I hate gambling, too. Things like this are the reason I don't even try to write anymore. Current Mood: crushed Current Music: OAR- Crazy Game of Poker (I'm so lame.) (1 beautiful lie | reciprocate)
Monday, February 21st, 2005
12:16 am	The Doctor has left us. Rest in peace, Hunter. Now who can we trust? (1 beautiful lie | reciprocate)
Friday, January 21st, 2005
11:09 am	I gots me a radio show (sorta) So I finally got off my arse and went through the requisite stuff to get myself an AM radio show (which isn't actually AM, but broadcasts through Channel 47 on BC cable.) So Jeffy's Excitement Hour with Exciting Jeff is about to rock. I believe it's Friday nights from 9-11, in case anyone can/ wants to listen. I haven't the foggiest idea what I'm gonna do. But it's gonna rock so hard. Current Mood: excited Current Music: Tom Scharpling archives (4 beautiful lies | reciprocate)
Thursday, January 20th, 2005
3:15 pm	In one of my classes, we were doing one of those "going around and telling the class something interesting about yourself" dealies. It was going fine until we came around to this girl from Long Island. She said "I went to the eye doctor and he said I'm going to go blind." Somehow, I was the only person in the class who couldn't control his laughter. Current Mood: guilty Current Music: Listening to Grace and Stevo chitchat (2 beautiful lies | reciprocate)
Wednesday, January 19th, 2005
4:48 pm	Sometimes, when I look at the massive bodies of work produced by real artists and entertainers, it makes me want to give up entirely. And now for another 2 months of silence. Current Mood: cynical (reciprocate)
Wednesday, January 5th, 2005
8:32 am	Happy Motherfucking Birthday 8 and a half hours ago, I turned 21. It's a major milestone, I'm told. It's not that super, though. I've still got a headache from Monday night's indiscretions, I can't fucking sleep, nobody's coming up from NJ, and I have to (well, I want to, but I'd rather do it with some sleep under my belt) go to dinner tonight. Then, I hope, maybe some poker. Speaking of poker, I lost 65 bucks in an online casino instead of sleeping. Now I'm cleaning my apartment (f'reals!). I'm trying to get something closer to the "lived-in" look, as opposed to the current "died-in" look. I'm goth as fuck. </bitching> Current Mood: cynical Current Music: I'm vaguely watching some Matt Dillon movie. (reciprocate)
Monday, January 3rd, 2005
5:55 pm	Thanks a lot, ambien. Alright, here is the plan. 1. Scooby do has to go, it's the rule, lump this here planqueThere needs to be a goof host movie, in a Scooby doo subdiversinteffuckingliegenble but HONESTY. Divisionionary tacticial move e WELL_+RE_) Gracie-ther-poo-onmy [arty imdurdtsmf yjthe basic instirninct in the human suffering. Huwellfufck yuo too, GENTILE! zzah. I beleive we have some Satan Rice Kid Crispies on hand.I wash me hands. amd to mutter anf mutter im underground, and then I'mlike toadyh is a;alone, decscendinMotherfucker. Freedpomn of thed on the immedakat experekj mce pf what a ;o PS. I quit quitting smoking and I still hate everyone. Current Mood: lonely Current Music: WFMU (1 beautiful lie | reciprocate)
Tuesday, December 14th, 2004
5:36 pm	It's not a livejournal unless there's something really lame every 5 entries. Your Ultimate Purity Score Is... Category Your Score Average Self-Lovin' 18.3% I wouldn't shake hands, if I were you 65.1% Shamelessness 40.5% Puts 'em on the glass 79.3% Sex Drive 26.3% I got needs, baby, you gotta unnastan'! 77.7% Straightness 1.8% Knows the other body type like a map 44.6% Gayness 42.9% At least one weekend of ecstacy 83.8% Fucking Sick 54% Dipped into depravity 90% You are 32.23% pure Average Score: 72.7% Take The Ultimate Purity Test and see how you match up! Current Mood: cynical Current Music: WFMU - The Radio Station for Depraved Sociopaths (1 beautiful lie | reciprocate)
5:07 pm	Today, Dan (Baslock) and I heard this strange music that I initially thought was some kind of nifty Indian pop. The sun glare coming from the direction of the music, so I couldn't figure out what was going on until the traffic light changed. When I saw where the music was coming from, I nearly shit myself. It was a dinky little car with a 6" menorah welded to the top. I'm not exactly sure what it was all about, but I hope it's some militant Jew trying to celebrate Hannukah every bit as obnoxiously as we celebrate Christmas. Powerful shit. Current Mood: impressed Current Music: Bruce Springsteen- American Skin (reciprocate)